It’s a typical Monday night in LA during lock down with nothing on Earth to do. I’m scrolling through Instagram and came across a video of a woman stating, “toxic relationships are more fun”. Hearing this made me think… “WOW! This is wild. Why would she utter those words?” Why would somebody ever say toxic relationship are fun? When a relationship is toxic there are underlining issues that need to be clarified. It’s characterized by insecurity, self-centeredness, dominance and control. It’s not healthy. It’s draining. It’s sad that we are ok with relationships being toxic because it’s more fun? Make it make sense people. We need to normalize healthy relationships.

If you have or want a romantic relationship, you probably want a healthy one, right? But what’s a healthy relationship, exactly? Good guys do exist ladies. There are great guys out there that aren’t just trying to jump into your pants every chance they get. Some actually want to get to know you on a mental level. But having a healthy relationship is boring? Nothing to argue about. He respects you too much. Is that even a thing? Can a guy respect you too much? Or do you just not respect yourself that you can’t comprehend what exactly is going on. This all starts with self-love people.

I’ve been there done that. I’ve been in a toxic relationship before. And when I tell you they are draining! It’s draining AF; mentally, physically and emotionally. Your partner being controlling is not a sign of love or that they care. Your partner calling you out of your name is not and I repeat is not a sign that they care. The fact that you can get this person this worked up is not a sign that they care. Your spouse putting their hands on you is not a sign that they care. Arguing all the time is not normal. You and your spouse should be able to converse like normal human beings without voices being raised. You can have passion without the toxicity. Make up sex can still be an option without the toxic energy.

Having a healthy relationship is actually refreshing. Having mutual respect for each other, trusting one another, being honest, willing to compromise, and good communication. Can you believe it? You can have all of these things in a relationship. Shocking. I know. One thing that stood out to be in the video I saw on Instagram is this lady stated toxic sex is better. I heard this and laughed. She would say that, because clearly this lady hasn’t connected with somebody on a deeper level before. She’s stuck on connecting with people through toxic energy. And that’s so elementary. Remember in Elementary when you liked somebody you were mean to them or they were mean to you when they liked you. Yeah, that’s the vibes this lady is giving off. We have to grow up and respect ourselves. Momma ain’t raise no fool over here. I come with big self-love energy. And It’s sad hearing those words come out of that lady’s mouth and what’s even more crazy is I know a lot of women who would agree with her.

I’m just wishing self-love and positivity on everybody. It’s 2021, let’s leave that toxic shit in the past.